I was always extroverted and open to communicating whatever I felt like I wanted to. Having this type of personality made things easier for me. I achieved more goals and built easier, meaningful connections. Generally speaking, I find communication vital with family members, friends, or work colleagues. But because the title of this post is called communication is the key to a healthy relationship, I would like to focus more on how we communicate with our life partners. Both men and women 😉 Often, we think physical love, passion, and emotions are all we need to have a healthy partnership and feel complete. What a terrible mistake.
Throughout the years and dating different guys, I realized more and more that Communication is the key to a healthy relationship.
First of all, Communication should come from both sides, and second, you need to discuss every aspect of the relationship.
To be very clear when I say talk, this is not just about misunderstandings or when shit hits the fan.
Even when something makes you very happy, or you like it, you should say it. And mention why. It makes the other person feel better and will have the chance to get to know you more and your person.
I’m saying in the first paragraph I am an extrovert, but as open as I am to talk at any time. There were moments when I didn’t know I should say something, open a subject, what to say and when to speak. Or how to approach a specific topic.
The issue is that when we don’t communicate properly, there is so much crap that can come out later on. And this, later on, can be too late.
Both genders are equally guilty. We think that we women only because we like to talk more, we have an advantage, and perhaps we are not responsible for the miscommunication in a couple. Have you thought you may not send the right message or choose the wrong timing for a sensitive topic? Not to mention that so many times, we just let the guys assume …
On the other hand, men are not any better. They don’t talk, and they can’t read between the lines. They have not the slightest clue.
If we don’t say anything or just give hints and we wait, assuming that he got it, and if he doesn’t do what we expect, we will end up getting upset.
When he has no freaking clue what is wrong.
I believe that on this matter, the ball is pretty much in our court, ladies. Because of the way we are built, we have the power to manipulate (in a good way) the flow of Communication in our relationships.
This does not excuse men not to give their best try either.
The more I thought about this subject in the past few years, and the more I experienced it, I realized that one of our significant mistakes is not communicating with our partners. Instead, we assume and expect him to “get it.”
He will not. And if he doesn’t take action, we get upset and take it personally.
We all know by now that men are different from women. They are not easily comfortable opening sensitive subjects, dissecting a topic, and talking until 7 am in the morning. Well – the vast majority, Some are – I had the “honor” to date a few, lol. But these men use Communication as a destructive tool that, in fact, does not help the relationship grow and improve.
Overall, something is evident here. If we don’t open our mouths to communicate properly with our partners, we are not straightforward in saying what we need, what we expect, and what makes us happy. If we don’t share what is bothering us, ask, we can end up in unpleasant situations and face misunderstandings.
Why Having Communication Skills Is So Essential In A Relationship.
GET TO KNOW EACH OTHER
By talking, we are building a bridge.
How well do you know the other person when you are dating someone? You don’t. Having dates and doing things together it’s great but not enough.
There will come a time after many years when you guys will know each other so well that only one look will be enough to get to know it. But this takes time. And even so, Communication never stops as a partnership is a continuous work in progress.
We tend to write so much these days, especially through text messages. It’s better than nothing, but just pick up the phone and call when something needs to be discussed or clarified. Or meet.
We think through a short text and stupid emojis, we got it all fixes. I hate it, and it’s so wrong.
How You Can Improve
KILL YOUR FEARS
Ego is driven by fear. Many times. Fear of rejection, fear of being misunderstood. Nobody wants to get hurt, and nobody wants to be rejected. It makes me feel small and insecure. If you care about yourself and the other person, go for it, you have nothing to lose.
CALL & MEET
It is ok and decent to text and voice notes, but guys, call, and mainly In-person meetings will be the supreme way of connecting with someone. Sure we are glued to our phones, and we can text, voice note, and call at any time. But as much as we can, let’s meet more in person and look into each other’s eyes.
Instead of texting all the time, just pick up the phone and dial that number.
Let me put it more harshly as reading this article, I realized that I am sugar-coating the situation. IF there is no talking (for whatever reason), it will NOT work out! Nothing 🙂
Simply leave your fears behind, open your mouth and say what you have to say.
The secret sauce to a healthy relationship is Communication. Of course, many other ingredients run the engines of a partnership, but Communication is a key aspect. Without talking, we leave room for so much misunderstanding and assumptions.
Your partner needs to know what kind of food you like, when they say something that hurts you, what you like or dislikes in bed, what are your culinary preferences if anything is bothering you, and so on,
I am not saying that Communication can save a relationship if it is doomed to end, but it can surely lift it and solve so much.
My Golden Advice
Never let something bother you or make you confused about something not clarified. Just open the subject.
Don’t over-talk either. Talk as it is necessary and move on.
Moving on afterward is also part of the solution.
Communicate – Understand Each Other – Find Solutions – Move On
Were you ever in a situation where proper Communication could have saved your relationships?
What would you do differently now?